We are 'The Haircuts'. We are a team blessed with increadible pace, which is our main weapon. Whether it be the sprinting ability of Jack Marsden in defence to cover a long ball, or a dangerous run down the wing by Will Simpson(who is extremely aerodynamic with his lack of leg hair), pace is everywhere.

James Cameron is the sun of a politician so we have to be nice to him. He has really nice boots that we all want to steal. He's not very good at FIFA 10.

Henry 'Akinbayi' Banks is lethal in and around the 6-yard box.

 As well as pace, we rely on the footballing brain of Alex Hope. Once described by Arsenal scouts as "the next Dennis Bergkhamp", 'Hopey' as his team-mates call him, our 68 year old seenil centre back,  has matured (both mentally and physically - check out his bald patch!) into an outstanding defender. Another mention has to be made for hopey, who is in contention for the leisure league 'life time achievement' award for his services to football after the first world war.

A word must also go to our keeper, Danny Halkon, who is amazing. He tends to dominate games with his increadible shot stopping and all round keeping. He is a great communicator but a bad drunk.

Marcus is our impact sub. He often provides pitchside entertainment when not involved in the games, with his 'questionable' but comical dancing technique.  He has been know to use his superior fitness to win games late on, and probably has the most touches of the ball when on the field.

 Jonny Marshall is the one shining light in this otherwise poor outfit, and tends to produce that bit of genius when its most needed.  Aswell as getting an untold amount of 'clunge', he has the ability to unlock a defence with a single pass, and find the back of the net from most areas of the pitch.